Tapping to Leave Today's Stress Behind You Tomorrow

Yesterday I made a two minute live video on Facebook, called "Don't Let Your Mind Mislead You." It did not go well. Well, my portion went fine, but the technology was screwy. You can see my explanation with the video here. (the video is about how your brain is always on the lookout for danger, but does it's job over well, keeping you anxious when all really is well)

 
 But this is everybody's day now, right? You sit down to do something that should take two minutes and it takes 2 hours because the technology needs to be figured out, finessed, or just turned off and on!

This is an excellent time to tap. While you're sitting there being frustrated, waiting for the little wheel to stop going around and around, what else is there you could do? You can Tap on the frustration. 

• Ask yourself if  it reminds you of another time you feel this frustration. 
• Focus on the feelings you feel. Don't get your mind all involved in the story by naming the sensations overly much, but really feel the sensations. They are the stuck energy wanting to be released and re-processed.
• Try to feel a sensation in your body you would prefer to feel, and keep tapping

Take these daily opportunities to release your stress in the moment and you can stop carrying your every day into every future day.  And - stop shoveling more stress into your already overburdened

nervous system.


And if you're ready to look into how to unburden your nervous system and start living a life of love and greater peace of mind and health, certainly contact me and let's talk tapping!

You can contact me at CalmHealthEase.com

 

Feel Your Feelings, They're There For A Reason.

A year or two ago I started a trial nutritional coaching program. It did not go well. As I got into the second and third call with this coach I began to realize how fraught this whole issue of food still was for me. Which is great knowledge to have. It is always valuable to know where your hidden stress is so you can deal with it. And of course I know the fastest way to deal with an issue is with tapping. In our day to day we have gotten adept at NOT feeling our feelings and we can suffer the consequences of negative feelings festering in quiet. But spending some time delving deep into this issue was eye opening and allowed me to tap on some deep hurt I thought I was over.

But that's not why the program did not go well. During one of our conversations I expressed the feeling that I did not think people would respect or give me credence unless I lost weight. Bless her heart, in trying to help she said,"You shouldn't feel that way! Why, look at coach and speaker  _____, she's quite overweight but very respected."

"You shouldn't feel that way."

Those words hang like a marquee in my memory.

Why shouldn't I feel that way? My history, my choices and reactions to experiences I've had, the culture I perceive I live in, the family I grew up in, the steady drumbeat: lose weight lose weight lose weight; the voices and opinions I heard everyday growing up; the taunts, the little and big slights flung my way; the comments about my body that everyone seemed to feel free to throw at me. Of course I feel this way.

Because I am me. These feeling are a road map of my history. Would I like to feel differently (and for the record, today I do), yes; that was part of the reason for trying this coach out. Improving my health and the health of others through tapping is my personal and professional goal. And I know other tools are helpful and necessary as well.

But the feelings (which are separate from the emotional "label" our brain uses to interpret the sensations coming from the body) are key to unraveling all those places where we are stuck in an old way of thinking; those feelings reflect the wounds that are still not healed. Where the child in us is still hurt and confused. Where we have not brought our loving kindness yet.

We can not 'not feel that way' to health. We must feel those sensations to unravel the tapestry all those strings have made. Then we can weave a new picture that reflects how we would like to feel. We can turn those angry reds into sunrise glories; those sad blues into sunnier skies; convert those lightning bolts into energy for healing and transformation.

So, please FEEL THAT WAY! But don't stop there. Whatever tools you use to transmute your lower emotional states to higher vibrations of calm, love and enthusiasm - do so. EFT is a powerful, rapid, safe and gentle way to do that. If you are in a big storm of emotions I can help you row that boat.

Somethings are best tackled with a friend or guide. I'd be happy to help.

you can contact me through my website at: CalmHealthEase.com

A New You in the New Year? Why I think there is a Better Goal

There is nothing wrong with you!

You don't need a new you.  The current you is a divine, loving, kind, beautiful being.  All that needs changing is the filter through which you see yourself.  People have often mocked those who see the world through "rose colored glasses." As if they were unwarranted in their rosy outlook. I submit that those are the enlightened ones. Those who see this world through the lens of love - see love. The Masters say that  Heaven is here on Earth.  What?  How can that be?   Those who see  through a filter of fear, see lack; a filter of anger sees danger.    In tapping what we're doing is removing the mud from your glasses so you can see the world through a different lens.  You can see yourself through a  clearer lens.  Then your light shines through  more clearly and your life is brighter and freer.
 

What would life be like if we eliminated the ideas that you were 
"not enough," that 
"I can't have that," or
"I'll never heal from this,"  
"that's just how I am," that 
"it's too dangerous to speak up"?  




Hmm.  What are the ways in which  you never even questioned the idea of who you are? Who you were really born to be, before the world taught you to be less, to hide, to not stand out?

To illustrate, finish this sentence, 'It's a truth that I am..........."                                                                 What popped into your mind?  Did you feel/think any of these...?

• I am fearful
• I can't talk in public
• I am easily intimidated
• I am generous
• I am kind
• I am fat
• I am sick
• I am never going to amount to anything
• I'll never be out of debt           

                                             
With tapping not only can we change the negative filter, we can transmute it to a positive one.  What would life look and feel like if any of these were the filter you saw yourself through, you're "go to" point of view....?

• I AM strong and confident
• I CAN do that
• I AM enough and I've always been enough
• I AM calm even when others are not
• Negativity just washes over and away from me
• I AM happy with my body
• I AM healthy and prosperous

  

Do you want to have a healthier happier life?  Well, you can.  Tapping is a great tool for that.  If you want to change how you are experiencing your life, contact me and we'll see if tapping is the right solution for you. 

To get started email me at: pheft22@gmail.com   and we'll set up a time to have a short chat.

until then,
keep tapping, it changes everything!


           (You can also  go to my website CalmHealthEase.com  and sign up for my free video series 

                                                      3 Steps to Start Releasing Stress

                                                                                    

 

But It's Just a Piece of Paper!

Overwhelm.

It happens to us all at times.  But why does something bother us one time and not  the next?  Stress.

Some of that stress you know about.   You are 'under' a lot of stress, perhaps with deadlines at work or school. The news is disturbing, or the neighbors are keeping you up at night. Illness, be it short term like a cold or more serious like the flu. What do all these things have in common?  They use our personal resources.  Our energy.

You've heard or said this... "I just can't think about that now."  Or, "I just can't deal with that right now." What's going to make it more "do-able" later?  Resources.  This is a complex issue to understand and explain but here's the analogy I use.

You're walking down the hall at work with your coffee cup in hand.  Someone intersects you and asks, "Can you take this piece of paper down to Carla's desk? "Of course"  you say.  It's just down at the end of the hall.

Now imagine this scenario.  You are walking down the hall with your cup of coffee.  You are also carrying a big box, and it's a bit awkward. And balanced on the box is a delicate piece of sculpture, and you're walking very carefully to make sure everything is safe and you don't spill your coffee. Some wise cracker keeps making sudden jabs at you  to see if  they can startle you into dropping your load, and you realize that this is all much heavier than you thought it was and your arms are shaking a bit.   Now, that same person walks up to you and asks "Can you take this piece of paper down to Carla's desk?"  What do you think your response would be this time?

You say in some level of exasperation (and politeness), "Uh, NO!  Can't you see I'm loaded up here!  What's the matter with you. Take it to Carla yourself!" 

Right?

In the first scenario you have plenty of resources to carry the piece of paper.  In the second you do not.  

But what are those resources?  They are essentially your feelings. You feel you have time, you feel strong enough, you feel capable.  And stress happens when you are asked to use time you do not feel you have. When you are asked to use strength you do not feel you have. You are asked to do something of which you don't feel capable.

It boils down to our feelings.  And in the end, stress does not come from outside of ourselves, it arises within us in response to a life stimulus.


Next time:  the stress you are (consciously) unaware of

 

Who Do You Think You Are?

Did You Hear That Growing up?

For many of us that was the sign that someone thought we were "getting too big for our britches"  or in some way thinking too highly of ourselves.  What it really meant was we were acting out of the "norm" our family, friends or teachers had established for us. It was a way to make us behave or  think in a way that would make them comfortable.   

But it is a serious question to ponder.  Really, who do you think you are? Are you generous, kind, funny?  Are you thoughtful, brash, reckless, cautious?  Are you bold, timid, well meaning?  Are you worthy of that great job, the love of your life. Are you good enough to have what you desire?  Do things come to you easily or are they ever elusive?

I've said this before.  You believe you have "beliefs." What you really have is set of brain habits.  Over the course of your life you have created an identity comprised of many thoughts and beliefs.  Every  thought creates a corresponding sensation in your body.  These are created by a complex recipe of hormones that tell you what you are 'feeling' in response to any thought. 

EFT is an awesome tool to discover what you really feel.  By looking at what is stressing you out, whether it be your health, past or present, some thought that's stuck in your head, a feeling of overwhelm, fatigue or any number of other things, we can relieve the immediate stress with tapping.  And to get longer lasting, permanent results, we go find the root of the issue and clear it out too.

And then it's gone! It's like clearing a drain.  Once the stuck energy is gone, it doesn't crawl back up the pipe to bother you again.  That's kind of an kind of icky analogy, but pretty vivid I think.  

Let's clear that stuff out!

 The Cart Before the Horse

 Have you noticed in life that when you achieve the wisdom from an experience but wish you had had that wisdom way back when, when you could have really used it?

Facebook is like that,  sort of.   It's like having a backwards conversation.  So in case you missed it here is a run down of recent posts, relating to my comments above, but in an order that makes more sense!

Look at these pictures and tell me if you see yourself in one of them. How do you know? Probably you had a feeling in your body that means "familiar" or "safe" to you. We all have images of ourselves in our conscious and unconscious minds. And at the root of social peace lies the ability to see "ourselves" in others. When you can consciously expand your image of your self with tapping, by letting go of stress and trauma, you are stepping onto the path of making peace in your world and therefor world peace. Are you called?

 I invite you take a census of what you think are your qualities, good and bad. Tomorrow we'll do something with that list. Don't get extreme, but are there 5 things you're great at? Are there 5 things you might like to change? What do you KNOW to be true of yourself?

 OK, you have your list from yesterday? (post of 2/20) Now, here's the question. Is it really true? There are many things we believe about ourselves that amount to little more than programming. Much of which has it's source so far back that we don't even know why we feel that way, so we put it into the category of "that's just how I am". Where it sits unquestioned for decades, influencing our choices and our life direction. What if you could change the story of your life? What if you could change your brain, and pick another direction? Here's the not-so-secret secret. You can. And tapping is the fastest way I know of to do that.

 Great. Now you've decided to try tapping and you want to get started. Good deal.
 But you feel your problems are with other people not yourself. Common feelings.
 How do we address that? We start with YOU of course. You are the only one
you have control over anyway, ever. But when YOU change, the people
 around you have to change too. Remember the pictures from a
 couple of days ago? People are accustomed to relating to their
"picture" of you.When you change the way you show up, they have
 to respond differently too. If you start showing up stronger
and more calm, what might the reactions be in your environment?

 When you say to yourself, "that's just how I am" do you know, or wonder, why? You may well know! Examples might be "I'm fearful of height because I fell off a ladder when I was 6." Until I was 22 I was terrified of bees because I had been stung twice (at the same time!) when I was around 5. Maybe you can trace your fear of speaking to the fact that every time you spoke up at home someone was sure to tell you to shut up because you were stupid. All these experiences add up to "How we are". You are probably also kind, or generous; intelligent, caring, resourceful, charming or many other wonderful qualities. But it's those negative qualities that seem to preoccupy our minds. And they are the ones that may be holding you back in key areas of your life, like your health.

 When you contemplate what makes you YOU, do some of your qualities confuse you? Are you afraid of things and don't know why? Timid of certain situations for no apparent reason? From the moment you are born your nervous system begins coding your experiences into two categories. Roughly speaking, good and bad. This is happening long before you are able to form memories. But your amygdala is tasked from moment one with keeping you safe. Did the color red show up at the same time a pain stimulus was delivered? Amygdala might code in "color red=pain=might be dangerous". That sense of unease, especially if oft repeated, codes for discomfort around the color red. so you might not like red shirts, or cars, or be uncomfortable around a really nice person because they have red hair or wear a lot of red clothes. And you don't know why, "I just don't" ! This may be an innocent example. but in certain situations this "coding" that makes you "be you" can be a really big stumbling block. Tapping can change that!

You can join the thread at my Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/lovetapping/


 Or come play with us at my FB group: From Stressed Out to Happy and Healthy

 Be Well.





























 

The Lies We Tell Shape Our Lives

Have you ever said?

You know, the white lies.  The words said to protect other's feelings, or avoid a long explanation to someone who doesn't merit it.  The explanations for when we feel  "no"  is not enough of an answer. Ladies, you get this. 

No.  It's a complete sentence.  Here's why you might want to adapt a 'truth or nothing' approach.

Words have meaning.  Sure, you get that. But words are also instructions.  Your body is always listening to what you say and think. Your brain doesn't know  the difference between your imaginings and "reality". 

          By the body I mean what you think of as the body and the energetic imprint,
          the totality of the operating system focused around it and informing 
          all your decisions.

When you use seemingly innocent phrases, to whitewash the truth, even with something so simple as saying, "I can't go to the store right now,"  your mind is listening.  Your body is listening.   But if you use "I can't"  to replace, "I don't want to" because it's easier than saying, "I don't want to take YOU to the store right now," you're setting up a small dissonance in your system.  It may be a small lie, and you think it may be relieving you of stress to tell it, but none the less, it's a small stress.

And the occasional small lie may not be of much consequence. But is it part of a pattern?  If you can't stand on your own two feet and say "I don't want to do that right now," where else are you lying to just get along?  And what is the toll it is really taking on you?

The Power of Words

          "Words become things --- choose the good ones"    Mike Dooly
          "Be Impeccable With Your Word"   From The Four Agreements"

The things we say often, with each iteration, become truer and truer. With each repetition  a bigger and bigger neural pathway is developing in our brains devoted to that statement. And  an external reality to go along with it will be created . If I say, or think, often enough I can't do something like:
  
          make more money
          heal my body
          find a great love partner
          deliver that great presentation
          make that jump
         land that great job

then my brain is going to create the circumstances that will reflect that and make it truth. 

Remember; words are instructions.

Our systems are stressed out by lying.  This is why a lie detection machine works. To reduce the stress we must bring our external environment into congruence with our beliefs. 

Conversely, this is why making positive changes can feel so hard.  You are trying to wrest control of your system from an operating system that is not taking you where you want to go.  And it will fight you for control. And being a million times bigger than your 'willpower' it will win.  Unless you have a secret weapon!

Tapping comes to the rescue.

     With tapping we can relatively quickly and easily get to the root of the limiting beliefs that are holding us back in our health, relationships, careers, and other endeavors.

     We can re-write the operating system to take us where we want to go. When we use EFT tapping we are un-bundling the neural pathway that says we can't, and building one that says we can.  And for most of the time that is a lot of fun.  Letting go of stress feels great.  And the benefits are life long, and life encompassing.

 

We Are Our Habits, and They Are Us

Patterns

We all have them.  And it's a good thing too.  Can you imagine having to figure out how to wash a dish, brush your teeth, put on your pants, talk politely, each and every time you had to do those activities.  (Some of you may be able to if you've had a brain injury.)  In the broad scheme of things we have learned what we need to know so well and so long ago that we no longer know that we 'know.'  It's just automatic.  We don't have to think about it, our bodies just do what needs to be done to carry out our will.

But some of that 'knowing' may not be so helpful.  And it is just as unconscious as tying your shoe laces. But these are learned behaviors and beliefs, like 'It's not a safe world,' 'I'm not strong enough.' 'I'll never be good enough,' 'I can't have that,' 'no one in our family goes to college,' 'our people don't believe that,' or 'that might work for others, but not for me,' 'I'll never get over this pain."

Reactions

There are real life consequences to these hidden or subconscious beliefs.  They  become the patterns that subtly, but completely, shape our lives.  If you are programmed to believe that to have material goods makes you greedy and bad, how likely are to you acquire them? You may consciously desire to be comfortable and have nice things, but if that means you have to be greedy and bad to do so, you are in an unwinnable inner conflict.

The subconscious always wins.  Because the subconscious is so massive in size and power compared to the conscious, you can't out think it.  But change is possible with tapping, and practice.

Awareness and Change

One of the most illuminating exercises you can do with tapping is to just state something you believe or would like.  For example,  try saying the statement, "I deserve to have everything good that I want."  Now, just feel how true that statement feels in you body.  Did your heart soar and say "YES, I DO!"  Or did you feel something like a lump in your stomach, a weight on your heart, or a constriction in your throat?   Something that said to you, "I don't completely  believe that."?

Body sensations are how the subconscious communicates to us. It does not have words to say, "I still harbor some shame from when we were two and got yelled at for breaking mom's cup." So, instead you have this lingering pain in your hip, that just won't go away no matter what you do.

Changing the Script

As an exercise, try writing down some  beliefs you have about who you think you are and what you want. Say each one out loud and feel what your body feels. If your body doesn't tell you that it's 100% behind this thought, there is some inner conflict that may be holding you back from what you desire to achieve or be. Are you trying to heal some hurt in your body?  Try this statement, "I'll never get better."  How true does that feel to you?  100% true, partly true, or completely false?  If it's even a bit true, those subconscious beliefs can hinder or halt your progress.

Tapping is one solution to this dilemma. It's one of the quickest and safest ways to discover and change this hidden programming so you can feel better and achieve your goals.

We all have patterns in our thoughts, movements, and reactions.  Want to make some changes? Try on a new thought.  Move in novel ways.  Question your reactions to life events.  Does something make you angry?  Is there another way to respond or feel about it?  Go left instead of right and see what new sights you might see. By creating novelty daily your brain will be stimulated to create new neural pathways  and this is great for keeping your brain healthy, and creating more choices for you in life.

Tapping while you do any of this reinforces the positive changes and works with the subconscious to release any blocks as well.

download my free Report: Change Your Brain and Get Relief Now at my website:  www.pennyhilleft.coachesconsole.com  

Want to learn how to tap?  Contact info is at the website, or email me pheft22@gmail.com